4/7/23 Night Page (brain dump/self therapy)
I have no voice. I have many thoughts, but no voice for them. No, not even this one. Although, this is a start. At least the thoughts are manifesting themselves by controlling the nerves controlling my fingers, engaging the part of me that learned letters in pre-k with the part of me that learned about computers and typing in the first grade, and synthesizing it into coherent sentences. Coherent sentences of what? Lord knows. Stream of consciousness, brain dumping, journaling, musing.... It's just blabbing, in a different form. Like crying wolf to a world too busy to listen much to anybody. That's the internet. That's what this musing is like, like putting my words in a bottle and casting them to the sea. Anyway, yeah, writing was never this hard. Creatively thinking was never this hard. There are people that do this for a living, enjoy it , and are good at it!!! I would also like to have it all, please. I would also like to love my life most of the time. I just can't...
